OneBandBand

An email from Candy, lead singer of the Thunder Achievers:

“Will! About the other night, I’m so sorry! I just didn’t know what to say…. Sometimes I have this thing, and, well, it’s hard to explain. Because you asked, T-Bar’s real name is Thomas Barnes. Thus, T-Bar. And, yes, my name = Candy. Full name. I guess my mom should’ve laid off the bottle for a minute before she filled in the form, but I like it, you know?

Anyway, I’m sure you R a cool dude, however, you got to stop disrespecting our music. We work super hard, and this is our life. We all came here to CA together to do this for real. For us, what’s important is that we are 1000% all the time. We don’t care about other people’s preconceived notions about what art SHOULD be. We believe in spontaneousness [sic] and doing whatever feels right to us. I/we will sing about sex and dogs and chowder, but these are just words. The important thing is EXPRESSION, and the passion in our music.

We are super-psyched about our upcoming EP release. We had a band meeting, and we want you there to cover the show. But you shouldn’t listen to everything that T-Bar (Thomas) says, because he has some pretty weird ideas. He’s in his own world a lot of the times, even though he seems perfectly normal. I think it’s because he grew up on this farm in the middle of Montana, with no one around, and he only had this shitty, broken ass guitar to keep him company. It only had four strings, and he didn’t know how to tune it right, and all that time spent alone kind of bent him somehow. Anyway, you will get to know him and the whole band, I hope.”

Okay, if I’m really going to become the Thunder Achievers’ handler, I already have a name picked out: Thunderarm Protection Management Co.